Tactic 07 of 99
The Butter-Up
Flattery works even when everyone knows it’s flattery.
What it is
Obvious flattery should fail. Often it doesn’t. Research by Elaine Chan and Jaideep Sengupta found that even when people consciously discounted insincere flattery, a positive gut impression of the flatterer tended to linger. The mind says “nice try.” The gut says “I like them anyway.”
Spot it
Praise that arrives right before a request. Praise that’s a bit too big for the moment. Praise from someone who never usually gives it.
Counter it
Name it to yourself: “That was butter.” Then imagine the same request with no compliment attached. Answer that version.